Listen to your horse

Following on from my post about Responsibilities...

There are days when I ask myself "What were you thinking?" - usually on days when I hadn't been thinking... like a horse.

Yesterday I must have had my stupid head on because I decided I must exercise the horses as I had missed two days and they had been on a patch of good grass. I fetched them from their place in the shade and asked Fina to do some flexions on the circle, it went well but she didn't seem particularly happy or herself. It was hot so I thought we would go for a ride instead of groundwork and it would be cooler in the woods. The horses were reluctant and at each junction were inclined to head home, but I was still thinking they needed work so off we went down another track, and they kept stopping, and in auto idiot mode, after a pause I would ask them politely to go on. Then suddenly, I woke up to realise that my horses were telling me it was too damn hot for anything! What had I been thinking of? Certainly not of my horses and their immediate welfare! So I got off, loosened the girth which felt too tight, swatted some pesky flies, and apologised to my horses. Fina was very hot. Lucie thanked me and asked if she could eat, we were in shady woods and there was a bit of grass. Fina was zoned out, so much so that at first she wasn't interested in grazing, I had let it get that bad! If she is upset, she goes into her shell. We hung out and I found some tasty morsels for her but it was minutes before she was able to relax and enjoy them and even then, now that I was properly observing, I could tell some distress and tension was still there from the way she was just picking at the grass. OK girls I said, let's go home! And I walked alongside, feeling suitably humble for being a human, and for not listening to my horses. It is a good thing that horses are so forgiving. I had let purpose take over and become more important than the relationship and connection with the horses, which I had ignored completely. They had been trying to tell me something and I hadn't been listening.

Relationships first!

Today was completely different, and I was back in horse world, which I usually am these days. Above incidents are rare but I am only human after all! Also I got up and outside a bit earlier. As before, the horses were already in the shade, in their shed. So we touched, greeted, and Fina asked for scratches, and Lucie asked if we were going outside where there is grass, I said not right now, and I asked Fina if she would come with me round the paddock which she did, because she likes being top girl and is very willing to be with me. So having established what seemed to me to be a good connection and empathy, I asked her if we could put the halter and line on and then  invited her to go ahead into the other field where we have room for big circles and manouvers, in the shade. Which is what we did, calmly and with connection, including some canter which she offered. Finishing with some liberty changes of direction. Lucie checked in with us from time to time and otherwise stayed in the shed. Calm and confident, offering a couple of suggestions for adding interest to the day, I think I was perceived as an okay sort of human today!

 

Yesterday's experience and my realisation of loss of connection through direct line thinking coincided with a similar experience being posted about on the Facebook page of this website, which has some excellent articles and perspectives http://www.happy-horse-training.com/

I like this approach and understanding of herd behaviour and human interaction and how we can improve our connection. I try to do this but don't put the same words to it. It is more than undemanding time, which is a neutral attitude. This is proactive in a very nonconfrontational way. I think of it as getting into horse time and leaving human world outside. As a human I have to make a conscious effort, not to barge in on the horses and start giving orders even in the politest way; walking into their group, stall or shed and putting the halter on is still just like walking into someone's house and taking over. There is another part of this about owning space when you come into the field or barn, and asserting ownership and dominance, but even then, there is no good in being rude or rushed, if we think about how horses do it and what are the qualities of good and bad leaders.

Responsibilities of horse - and human

I have noticed that I often get misunderstood when I comment on posts or forums. This may be because I explain things badly. It may be because those reading do not choose or are not in a position to understand. It can also be because in the natural horsemanship methods (which itself is a misunderstood and frequently abused term, within and outside of the method) there are many simplified ways of saying things that are easily understood by practicants but sometimes misunderstood by others. Sort of short codes or memory hooks, such a handy part of the tool kit.

So here is another frequently misunderstood concept - responsibilities.

This doesn't mean letting your horse take over and make decisions. That can make them confused and unconfident, or lead to dominant behavior and loss of connection, and they won't think you are much of a leader to be relied on. It is not simply about cooperation and it is certainly not just about the horse letting you do something to him, whether you are asking politely or telling him to submit or over desensitizating.) 

It is all about the horse being involved in what you are doing and giving it his attention and active cooperation.

It surprises me how seldom people connect with and ask their horses for their attention and participation in basic everyday tasks. Standing for mounting or even better, asking them to be responsible for positioning themselves for you to get on. Standing still is non negotiable, but to expect the horse to stand still means giving them responsibility for that task (you cannot make them do it) starting with teaching them what is going to happen and what is required of them, when you put a foot in the stirrup and cause a weight change which they need to think about compensating for. So you are asking them to take responsibility for re-balancing themselves. And when I say "ask" I mean through thought and intent and connection, sometimes words can help but not as commands.

Examples of your horse's responsibilities in everyday tasks: e.g. haltering, does your horse offer to put his nose in the halter or bridle? Feet, does he offer his feet for picking as you move around from one leg to the next? Who holds the feet up? Does your horse accept his responsibility and participate in the task? Or is his mind elsewhere as you do all the work?

Have you asked him to participate? 

Let him know, by first quietly and persistently teaching him how you would like him to present his head when you stand in a certain position (be consistent, and be calm and still!). Horses don,t know this, but they are capable of very quickly understanding if our presentation is correct. For haltering, I like to stand at the shoulder, and have him bend the head towards me then drop his nose into the halter which is offered. I used to present the head collar to the nose and flip the end over the head, now I prefer the horse to lower the head and my arm goes over his neck to bring the loose end over to the knot. I can gently encourage the head to come to me if necessary. Which provides a nice flexion of body and mind. I do this in reverse when removing the halter, and I wait, for as long as it takes, until I have the horse's mind turned towards me as well as the head. If the eyes or ears are looking at something else or thinking about heading off to grass or water, I wait. I think this is very important. You are then in a position to release the horse's mind not just his body, because you need to encourage connection if you want partnership, so the more you define the idea of connection the better, therefore you need to be clear about the release. The little details are important to horses! It is always nice if the horse chooses to stay with you once the halter is off, but it is better if you make the decision when to leave. I sometimes give a little push away, or a send, to say go now and join your herd mates. Watch how horses dismiss each other after a mutual grooming or standing together, it can be instigated by any herd or pair member but it is usually the higher ranker that decides when to end it and either walks off or sends the other horse away and reclaims its space.

If we don't treat our horses as thinking beings we cannot expect them to use their brains. 

They are quite happy wombling around in horse world and if we treat them like simpler beings that is how they will behave. A bit like humans really. In my experience horses are most likely to behave as we expect them to

So often, I see in life or in videos the horse being led then pulled to a stop or position. Or being held so the rider can mount. Or standing (or moving around) at the mounting block. Or looking into the distance, his mind obviously elsewhere. Or being handled, groomed or led and not moving in coordination with the human, who seems either unaware or incapable of asking the horse to BE WITH THEM, not to move off without them or get in front or behind.

Do not confuse the idea of giving responsibility to that of micromanaging the horse. The first is about connection, mental and physical, asking not making and the latter is when you are constantly fussing around or telling the horse what to do and correcting them when they make mistakes, which they will do when you do not give them the responsibility of acting with you like a partner.

Giving the horse responsibility means asking them to be with you in the activity, thinking about what you are doing together. More than just looking at you and not being distracted by something going on elsewhere, or other horses, it is getting that connection where you are both focused on the same idea. When your idea becomes your horse's idea. A partnership in which you are both aware of subtle body language and energy in each other, where a thought becomes an action, where you move and act as one being. 

The PNH Responsibilities of Horse and Human:

Human: Don't act like a predator (I said "act"... ) - act like a partner Think like a horse Use the natural power of focus Have an independent seat (riding) 

Horse: Don't act like a prey animal - act like a partner Maintain pace and direction Look where you are going

Further reading/blog posts in the making:

Those of my horsey friends that know me will already know that I am opposed to the giving of hand fed treats, because I think it distracts the horse's mind from connection with you and from thinking about the task...

Leadership: Another concept in which I fail to make myself understood to humans, but works well with horses...

Mindfulness: I am working on myself to develop this further.